Monday, August 01, 2005

Not know

Jeff keeps asking me questions. Pregnancy questions.

Asking me. And all I can say in return is, "Sorry, love, not know."

It's dawning on me that I don't know anything about pregnancy. What's more, it's dawning on me that I actually need to find out.

You see, after the first few cycles of failure, I never let myself think too far ahead. My only goal for two years was to get pregnant, but somehow it never occurred to me to learn anything about what to do if it happened. Oh, sure, I've picked up a few things from the pregnancy-after-infertility blogs, but, I mean, there are basics I don't know. Like, for example, what the doctor will be seeking with his magic wand on the 10th. I've heard words like "yolk sac" bandied about here in blogland, but I have no freaking idea what one is. (Is it a gloppy yellow sphere, like in my free-range breakfast eggs?) And when should he be able to see a heartbeat, if there is one? And can I eat gorgonzola, take a bath, take my allergy medicine? How long will it be before I need pants with a drawstring waist? (Oh. God. I hadn't even imagined maternity clothes before. How can I not have thought of this?)

My level of unpreparedness knows no bounds. Imagine what will happen if an actual baby comes out of this. Yegads. Do you think, somewhere along the line, I'll get my head in the game and learn to breastfeed and change a diaper? Maybe?

17 Comments:

Blogger Mudbug said...

Oh yes. We realized one day that we had never considered that it might actually *work*. I mean, who believes that?!?

I would be happy to share my early pregnancy Google MD and fav websites if you want 'em. Just let me know.

7:03 PM  
Anonymous Leggy said...

This is just a quick & dirty of some basics.

Yolk Sac- not entirely sure what the scientific definition is, but The yolk sac and the fetal pole are basically what happens when embryo converts from blob of cells to something resembling a fetus. If they don't see by 7 weeks or so, it means its a blighted ovum (embryonic sac but no baby growing in it)- been there done that.

Not sure about heartbeat- its been 5 years since I've seen one so I kind of forget the timing.

Needing new clothes- I lost about 8 pounds in the first month or so post PG test because I wasn't interested in food. Then at about 10 weeks PG, appetite came back with a vengeance and I needed new clothes by about 12 weeks along. Also note- unless you are skinny to begin with and you gain only the recommended 20-25 pounds- you will outgrow even your maternity clothes and you'll need to go back and get the larger sizes/tent dresses at about 7-8 months PG.

Gorgonzola, allergy meds, etc- it depends on your doc (they all say different things) and how neurotic you are. I am personally very neurotic- so I just avoided as much as I could because it made me less crazy. Evidence since then seems to suggest that hair dye and soft cheese are old wives tales, but I'd ask your doctor.

If your curiousity gets the better of you, under no circumstances are you to buy "What to Expect When You're Expecting." Its full of assvice that makes you crazy (eg, eat only bran muffins & broccoli and NEVER eat chocolate or you are a bad mommy that intentionally chooses to give your precious bean a bad start in life). Go to babycenter & some of the other websites where they email you a "what's going on with your baby" update every day/week.

Hope this helps.

7:29 PM  
Blogger PJ said...

Leggy said it all. I'm pretty sure you can see most heartbeats by 6-7 weeks. Some can see it in the latter half of week 5 some have to wait all the way till the end of week 7. As usual, it depends.

It's a whole new education. And I totally second the not to purchase the "What to expect when you're expecting" book. I started reading it during my last pregnancy and found nothing useful in there. Lots and lots of assvice.

8:30 PM  
Blogger Susie said...

"What to expecting" stinks a lot, stay away. However, there is a lot of good information online (I like the Mayo Clinic website) and your local library should have a lot of good books. I find that checking books out of the library is best for me, becuase I always feel that if anything bad happens I can take them back and I won't have them lying around... it's worked for me.

Good luck!

3:10 AM  
Anonymous Rori said...

Don't worry, you'll learn all you need to know (fyi, soft cheeses are ok as long as they are pasteurized - most sold in the US are).

You can get a FREE book - Mayo Clinic Complete Book of Pregnancy and Baby's First Year (great, informative book)- through the State Farm Website. Click on Life Events & Stages and then on Having a Baby. If you're not a current customer, email me and I'll give you the user name and password to use. It's a huge hardback book that goes for $30+ at Borders...

5:50 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I just had to link to this article in The Rake, a free monthly...
I just had to link to this article in The Rake, a free monthly magazine published in the Twin Cities.
Willie
hair color remover

6:04 AM  
Anonymous deborah said...

Here's a quick lesson you can start using right away. Now that you're pregnant, you'll have to switch from talking about Days Past Ovulation/Transfer (dpo/dpt) to how many weeks along you are.

I think I was still saying something dumb like "I'm 49 dpo" when someone gently pointed out to me that it would be much clearer to just say I was 9 weeks pregnant.

I'll bet you didn't know what a hysterosalpinogram was when you started your infertility struggle, either. You'll learn the lingo quickly enough!

6:23 AM  
Blogger K|nneret said...

Well, I can direct you to a pic on my blog ... http://brightchaos.blogspot.com/2005/03/it-looks-like.html this was at 6 weeks +.

Here is a link to the previous "slightly enlarged sac" and you can see the difference.
http://brightchaos.blogspot.com/2005/02/im-still-pregnant-and-little-bit-about.html

I'm sorry if this is TMI ... I'm just a concrete thinker and as such, I give concrete examples. Don't mean to offend or anything.


I'll be checking out Willie's Hair colour remover shortly. Stay tuned.

7:00 AM  
Blogger Pazel said...

CONGRATULATIONS!

No pregnancy is the same, so really take any advice or information with a grain of salt, including mine.

I never had morning sickness, so I started gaining early and switched out of my pants early. But, maternity pants were too small so I had to buy a couple pair of larger size pants. I'm wearing them now while I try to lose the baby weight.

7:57 AM  
Blogger Pazel said...

Um, I mean I was too small for maternity pants.

7:58 AM  
Blogger Suz said...

My dear, I have no clue either ... and it's terrible because I'm afraid to buy actual books.

8:04 AM  
Blogger kristenL said...

I started wearing my maternity clothes at 8 weeks. But I am a big boned lass to begin with, it isn't so much the weight gain as everything SPREADING...

11:56 AM  
Anonymous Z said...

sometimes ignorance is bliss. but i'm sure you'll know all you need to know soon enough.

4:30 PM  
Blogger Anotherjen said...

A lot of places have early-bird prenatal classes that you can take in tour first/early second trimester to give you the low down on diet,exercise and whatnot.

we saw the heartbeat and yoke sack (which looked like a big circle compaired to the blob that was the embryo)at 6w5d. that was the day i felt like found out i was pregnant. too unbelievable up until then. It might take a while- but it'll sink in.

I like the Dr. Sears pregnancy book, personally. What To Expect is the devil.

9:24 AM  
Anonymous Day said...

Bugs, I know exactly how you're feeling right now. When you get a chance check out my archived posts from December 04 - specifically this one:

http://abeautifulday.blogs.com/a_beautiful_day/2004/12/when_ivf_works_.html

I had a candid chit-chat with my RE and got some very useful and helpful info which I posted on my site.

Hope it helps!!

10:55 AM  
Anonymous T said...

Seems like there are quite a few of us in this not know boat - good luck to us!

12:05 PM  
Anonymous Liza said...

There's an absolutely wonderful, non-bossy, funny, book called "Bun in the Oven" by Kaz Cooke.

It reads like what would happen if your funniest, hippest friend wrote What to Expect.... I can't recommend it strongly enough.

Other than that, I recommend asking lots of questions of your doc and other health care providers. Mine were wonderful, especially the repro docs, even when I had insanely paranoid concerns.

8:36 AM  

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